What to do when the reality of retirement doesn't live up to your expectations

Lily* used to work as a financial services consultant, and has been retired for 7 months.

Sharing from personal experience, she suggests that one needs to “ease into retirement” rather than have it be a sudden transition from ‘work’ to ‘no work’.

She herself needed the time to care for her son, who suffers from a developmental disorder, as well as her mum, who suffers from dementia.

Apart from caregiving, she advises planning and scheduling a list of activities on how you wish to spend your time.

This timetable can then be used as a useful playbook for you to avoid feeling aimless or unfulfilled.

Some other examples include the pursuit of a passion project, volunteering on a regular basis, exercise, or learning a new skill.

Essentially, by keeping yourself busy with activities and hobbies, you should find retirement meaningful rather than dreary. 

But why is this important? 

Because as Lily shares: she’s had many clients who have retired, only to realise it’s a process of getting used to a new lifestyle.

Some may need 6 weeks while others take 6 months, but the eventual goal for most is to settle on a routine that you feel comfortable with and can adhere to.

Being gainfully engaged

Lily’s account provides useful insights into what retirement is actually like, which may not be what many people envision.

When people refer to “retirement”, some envision a golden era where they can finally pursue their hobbies and spend quality time with their loved ones.

It also implies that you will have sufficient savings to tide you through these years so that you can enjoy a lifestyle that you desire.

However, the reality of retirement can turn out to be quite different from what most people may have been led to believe.

When you retire, the first few weeks or months might feel refreshing and liberating.

With so much time on your hands, you spend it by travelling and meeting up with friends or acquaintances whom you may not have had time to meet when you were working.

In some cases, retirement can eventually take a psychological or emotional toll on you.

Having stopped work, you may start to feel lost as you lose your sense of purpose and identity.

If you once held a high-ranking corporate position, the sudden “fall from grace” may feel jarring, causing you to lose respect and recognition among your peers, business partners, and ex-colleagues.

Some people may become so defined by their careers that retirement even leads to a period of depression or anxiety. 

Once the initial euphoria wears out, you can end up feeling aimless as time, which once seemed like a luxury, now seems to be in excess.

Hence, when we talk about planning for retirement, we must consider that it is not just about the financial aspect. The planning should also encompass how you spend your time and what activities you’d like to engage in.

Proper retirement preparation

Retirement planning should involve two key aspects: the financial aspect, and how to spend your time.

The financial consideration is made up of two distinct parts.

The first is to have a sufficient sum of money to tide you through emergencies (such as health issues or accidents) before you stop working.

The other is to have a passive income source that can supply you with cash to sustain your lifestyle post-retirement.

Once you have these two sections covered, you can say that you are well-prepared for the financial aspect of retirement. 

For passive income, find out how to build different sources of passive income.

To unlock tax savings with the Supplementary Retirement Scheme (SRS), find out about SRS tax relief and how to invest your SRS.  

Figuring out what you enjoy

The second aspect which is just as crucial but often gets left out of the conversation is how to spend your time once you retire.

As Lily’s example shows, you need to plan how you will transition from a life of work to one of complete leisure.

There are only so many countries you can travel to, so many movies you can watch daily, or so many hikes you can take around Singapore.

Once you have completed these activities, you may end up with too much time on your hands and feel frustrated with how you use it.

Thus, you need to honestly ask yourself how you wish to stay engaged post-retirement.

Is helping people your cup of tea, or perhaps you wish to pick up new skills such as knitting, a musical instrument, or art?

Once you have figured out how you wish to spend your time, you can then better plan for retirement.

You can also include regular “breaks” for exercise, chilling with a loved one over a cup of coffee, or other activities that you enjoy, such as a walk through a mall or window shopping.

The key is to fill up your “timetable” with activities that bring you joy and purpose, and only you know what these are.

A “hybrid” retirement model

Retirement should not have an overly rigid definition.

Currently, people recognise retirement to be a scenario where you stop work entirely, but a hybrid retirement model is also possible where you work part-time, at your own pace, while still having sufficient time to pursue your hobbies and passions.

This scenario can be described as the “best of both worlds”, where you still retain structure in your life through work, but avoid the stress and pressure of having to meet deadlines or deal with unreasonable bosses.

If need be, you can always choose to “fire your boss”, and this can be made clear to your superior when you decide to opt for “partial retirement”.

Retirement should not merely be defined as the stoppage of work, but should be a period where you can feel meaningfully engaged.

This hybrid model could work well if you can negotiate such an arrangement with a current or future employer.

Retire on your own terms

The reality is that retirement may not be quite as idyllic as it seems. 

Aside from monetary issues, you may lose your sense of purpose and become frustrated by the lack of structure that work provides.

By planning your time and finances adequately before you take the plunge, you can minimise the risk that you feel aimless, or that you need to start worrying about money.

Remember to draw up a schedule of how you wish to spend your time, along with activities or hobbies that you want to pursue.

You may also explore a hybrid retirement model where you can work part-time or freelance and have more free time to do what you wish.

A hybrid model has the advantage of keeping you gainfully occupied while supplying some income that you can use to boost your retirement savings.

With proper planning, your expectation of retirement should not differ much from its reality.

*Note: Names changed to protect privacy.

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